A reader wrote this about Divine Divorce,
“I’ve read some of the articles on this website which concern divine divorce and I found these interesting. I have a recommendation for an article topic I would enjoy having your opinion about. Have you heard the ‘apoluo’ vs ‘apostasion’ debate? Whereas “apoluo”(Greek) means “put away”, “apostasion”(Greek) means “divorce” and both terms are used in the bible.
“In short, the premise of the debate is that the verses in the bible which speak against divorce actually speak against “putting away”(apoluo) one’s spouse without a written bill of divorcement, not actual “divorce” where papers are signed. In essence, in ancient times, men would “put away” their wives without giving them a bill of divorcement to officially dissolve their marriages. This kept women in a strange limbo state where they were neither married and neither divorced. They could not remarry nor return to their husbands and this was a cruel predicament for them to find themselves in. This is what God spoke against when he spoke against ‘divorce’, not actually properly divorcing a spouse by giving them a proper written certificate of divorce. Anyways, if you have time, I’d love for an article on the subject to be written and added to the website. Thank you.”
I very much appreciate when readers ask questions and make comments, it helps us explore these topics together. Thank you!
When I read this question, I thought it made a good point about how it is sometimes unclear how to interpret scriptures in light of our distance from their historical context. While I don’t feel led to examine these specific Greek words, what I do want to speak about today is that God’s Spirit and His Word agree – even if we don’t understand precisely how. That is to say that our Father has one, consistent viewpoint, and what He says to us by His Spirit agrees with what is written in the scriptures. Moreover, His viewpoint on divorce, while expansive, is congruent from the first century until now.
However, God says,
“For the prophecy came not in old time by the will of man: but holy men of God spake as they were moved by the Holy Ghost.”
2 Peter 1:21
Therefore, the scriptures are derived from what the Holy Spirit speaks and not the other way around.
Just as in the days when the prophets of old spoke as the Holy Spirit moved them, so, too, God speaks today and moves upon people to reveal His will. That same Spirit that came upon Isaiah, Ezekiel, and Jeremiah, now lives in us and leads and guides us even more intimately. In fact, that same Spirit that raised Christ from the dead now moves within each one of us if we yield to His still small voice.
The word agrees with His Spirit
Therefore, what His Spirit speaks to each one of us is of greater authority and has more significance than our man-made doctrines. His Spirit does not violate His word, and neither does His word violate His Spirit. In fact, as the scriptures state, “The Word was with God and the Word was God.”
However, and this is where I think the comment at the beginning of this essay highlights a good point, when we try to interpret God’s word from a distance of about 2000 years, sometimes the cultural context can be obscured. After 2000 years it becomes difficult to understand everything as easily as they did. What Jesus said to those in the first century made perfect sense – within their time – but today we need the Holy Spirit to illuminate its true meaning. Take, for example, the book of Philemon, which speaks about slavery. How do you literally apply that today? The truth is you can’t, because those circumstances don’t exist in our culture.
Therefore, when we try to understand Christ’s words, spoken to Pharisees and religious Jews, in a modern context, situational specifics get lost, because they don’t translate well into our present understanding. This is precisely the case with the standard doctrine concerning divorce as it is interpreted in normative Christianity.
Do you eat pork?
Most people don’t wash another believer’s feet, observe clean and unclean food laws, force the women in church to wear head coverings, or prevent women from teaching. Yet all those doctrines are specifically laid out in scripture. Why don’t we follow them now? It is because we understand that those types of activities don’t apply to our current societies. For instance, most people don’t walk on a dusty dirt road to church, therefore they don’t need to have their feet washed before they enter a house of worship. Our food is cleaner these days, so most people even eat pork, which was strictly forbidden in Christ’s day.
Likewise, our understanding of the scriptures is an approximation of what God really means, and because we are fallible, we must understand that our teachings may also be flawed. Through pride and arrogance, many church leaders and theologians believe they only speak “the word of God”, but in reality, hardly any of them can agree on what that word of God is. This is why the Holy Spirit, who wrote the scriptures, is of better authority to interpret His word than we are. While we do the best we can to understand what He wrote, it should always be with the proviso that His Spirit can lead and guide us into further truth when we misunderstand. When He says something that contradicts what we have been taught, instead of rejecting His voice, we should rather ask as Mary did,
“ And in the sixth month the angel Gabriel was sent from God unto a city of Galilee, named Nazareth, To a virgin espoused to a man whose name was Joseph, of the house of David; and the virgin’s name was Mary. And the angel came in unto her, and said, Hail, thou that art highly favoured, the Lord is with thee: blessed art thou among women.”
And,
“How can this be, since I am a virgin?” The angel answered and said to her, “The Holy Spirit will come upon you, and the power of the Most High will overshadow you; and for that reason the holy Child shall be called the Son of God.”
Luke 1:26-28, 34-35 – NASB 1995
The Holy Spirit is always preeminent
When God speaks, His Spirit takes precedence over what we believe, simply because our understanding of His word is imperfect, while He is perfect. This is why we can trust His voice to lead and guide us into all truth, knowing that even when we can’t clearly see how what He means fits into our theological understanding, it eventually will. An example of this is when Jesus said, “Except ye eat the flesh of the Son of man, and drink his blood, ye have no life in you.” No one understood this but Jesus at the time, though as they followed after Him and were filled with His Holy Spirit, they eventually did.
Understanding Divine Divorce through God’s Spirit
When God leads a man or woman to divorce, they often face strong opposition from their family, friends, and most of all, their church. In an already difficult situation, they must contend with others who are sure, based on church doctrine, they are making the wrong choice. For those on the outside of their situation, there is little sympathy for their plight and, in fact, many times a cruel hardness of heart toward them that is unworthy of the faith they profess.
When you think about it, those who are not facing the challenges of those who are being led to Divinely divorce – who may not even be hearing God’s voice for their own lives – face little real-world consequences for forcing others to “stay the course” and “trust God in a bad marriage.” To outsiders and clergy, all that matters is doctrine, no matter how ludicrous following their dogma is.
Only you will stand before, and give an account of, your life to Christ at the Great White Throne Judgment. All that will matter in that hour is if you heard God’s voice and did His will. God speaking to you today is more important and of greater authority than all the church fathers, pastors, counselors, friends, and family who are not open to hearing what He is telling you to do.
When God speaks, He is correct, and it is our understanding that needs adjustment. Our Father knows perfectly well what He means, and He means what He says, no matter if you or anyone else understands it. The Spirit agrees with His word because His Spirit wrote it, but that doesn’t mean His Spirit must agree with our interpretation of the scriptures or the doctrine we derived from it. Oftentimes, because we misunderstand what He said, we live in consternation, trying to work out principles and teachings that have nothing to do with what He actually meant. This is particularly true with Divine Divorce.
It matters what God says to you personally
For many believers, marriage, even inside a church, is a civil contract made between two people. It is an agreement formed with the best intention between those who have decided to wed. Often, God did not lead them to be together and thus, just as your decision to wed was yours, your decision to divorce is yours. However, if God has joined you as Divine Mates, you should not break apart what He put together. In that case, just as He led you to become man and wife, He would have to lead you to divorce. In either case, if the Holy Spirit leads you to separate from your spouse, it is His prerogative to make that decision, for He is Lord over all.
No one breaks a marriage lightly. It is a heart-wrenching and difficult decision, which most people struggle with endlessly. I do not advocate divorce except when there are clear reasons for doing so or when God specifically leads you to separate. It is always, ultimately, between the believers involved and God. The main disagreement I have with most church doctrine on this subject is that it is based on words Jesus spoke to the circumstances and cultural situations that are not always relevant to our day and age. In the modern-day church, there is no way to “repent” for a foolish vow, and that sometimes traps people into marriages that they cannot escape without losing the favor and love of family members, friends, and their church. Our Father is simply not that cruel.
Finally, the Holy Spirit must be given preeminence in our lives and be allowed to rule our understanding of His word. Man’s understanding of scripture is imperfect, God’s Spirit is not. For example, hardly anything that the medieval Catholic church taught as sound doctrine is even remotely true today. The fact is, in relationship to God’s Spirit, our understanding of His true intent, and the meaning of His scriptures, is not much better. Allow God to lead you, and trust His voice. Do not worry if others don’t understand or agree with what He is speaking to you. Always remember, Jesus is your Lord, and as one of His sheep, you only hear His voice.
