Is Holy Intimacy Safe Between Believers?
Can We Trust God And Each Other To Love As He Intended?
For many, the thought of giving or receiving a holy kiss is uncomfortable. Though the scriptures mention this practice 5 times, imagining being that close to another believer fills us with a sense of dread. Why is that?
In the natural realm, attraction is a complex set of cues our five senses pick up on. It is most often our natural man or woman, who is attracted to another. From experience, we know these emotions are very powerful, sometimes not discriminating between what is holy and what is not. Some even equate falling in love with animal attraction. I say to you though, in the beginning, it was not so.
Why do we fear intimacy?
For men especially, we can be led astray by our lusts, desiring a woman simply by looking at her. Of course, we reason, if we get too close to a sister in the Lord, we may sin.
This is, or some form of it, our reasoning as to why we restrict intimacy within the Body of Christ. Being Christians we don’t want to sin, therefore since we don’t trust ourselves in intimate situations with anyone other than our mate, we put restrictions on our behavior. That sounds reasonable, doesn’t it?
To the pure all things are pure
From a natural standpoint, with people who are not led of the Holy Spirit, restricting access to things that might be temptation is a reasonable practice. After all, you would not take a reformed alcoholic to a beer party. However, this is at best a superficial fix for a problem that goes much deeper. The problem is how we approach intimacy altogether.
In the beginning, when all things were pure, sexual attraction did not arise from our natural man. Wanting to make love to a woman was not a function of how beautiful she looked or how sexy she acted, but rather it was a spiritual drawing towards her spirit. God in us, drew us to the woman of His choice and our love for her was instigated by Him through our spirits. The union between God and man caused us to be attracted to whomever He desired (initially Eve) and we instantly felt a magnetic attraction.
Holy Sex!
Holy sex, the way God originally intended, stemmed from a spiritual attraction. Our deep, God ordained desire to unite with another’s spirit, led us to love them physically. However, though the physical lovemaking was incredible, it was the spiritual union during intercourse that made it heavenly. Sex was merely an outflow of our desire to become one with Him.
Thus, spiritual intimacy, from a hug to coupling, is a holy act authored by YHWH Himself. When we feel this heavenly love, we desire to handle it with the utmost care. If, as a woman, you feel led to kiss another brother in the Lord, you can’t possibly imagine trying to seduce him in to further intimate expression if God doesn’t wish you to do so.
Holy intimacy is completely safe
This feeling of holiness in intimacy is so strong, it makes close physical contact with the opposite sex completely safe. You can be alone with another person and express physical affection and never, ever cross the line into sin. The Holy Spirit is, in fact, the best chaperone in the universe.
The reason that it is important to talk about such intimate things is that God wants to kiss His Bride. Intimacy is in the mind of Christ right now, and if we are so caught up in wondering whether we are sinning, we can’t be free to love Him. Moreover, the way that Christ loves us is through other members of his body, and if we refuse to allow ourselves to love or be loved by them, we stymy the desires of our Lord and Savior.
Do not let fear rule your life
Fear rules many people’s lives. We are afraid of what we “might do” rather than what “God wants us to do”. Especially in areas of intimate behavior, believers are all tied up in knots and frustrated as hell. Frankly, this frustration is from the pit, because we can never know God intimately if we are afraid of love.
In conclusion, the way forward into the Bride of Christ is through trusting God enough to yield ourselves to Him. As God wills and only as God wills, love one another as His Holy Spirit leads. We do not have to fear sin because, while walking in the Spirit, we have no propensity towards it. Though our natural man cannot imagine such freedom, our spirits are made by God to experience it! As we decrease, Christ increases and love manifests through all of us.